People find themselves in a Situationship when they do not define their relationship. But as time goes on and feelings become more involved, it gets confusing as one begins to notice the contrast between the situationship and romantic relationships. It is only normal for someone who wants more out of the relationship to explore the option of turning the situationship into a relationship.
A Situationship can turn into relationship by defining clearly what is going on between your partner and you, and then including titles(boyfriend and girlfriend) to the relationship to make it clear what it is going on between the two of you and get rid of the confusion. However, it is not wise to enter into a situationship with the hopes of turning it into a relationship as you might be disappointed.
What is a situationship?
After a couple of dates with a particular person who you are interested in, there is a chance that you may begin to develop feelings for them, and maybe, you may want a romantic relationship if you really felt a connection with the person.
But when the romance continues without defining it as a relationship, then it becomes a situationship.
A situationship may seem like a romantic relationship, but it isn’t really one. On one hand, the both of you are engaging in activities as a couple in a relationship, but on the other hand, you haven’t really agreed to call it so, and it makes it hard for you to describe them as your girlfriend or boyfriend.
If you had to ask “what are we,” at any point in your romance with someone or had to describe your relationship status as being complicated then it’s probably a situationship.
Unlike a relationship, the situationship lacks clarity: it sure does feel like a relationship but you don’t really know what you’re up to.
At times you connect with someone so fast that you don’t feel like taking a pause to really understand what might be going on between you and them, everything just seems to ease out, and as time goes, you find yourself doing what couples usually do.
At times the situationship is all about convenience, it’s easier to have someone give you what you want from a relationship without really taking up any responsibility at your own end.
A problem with situationships is the lack of clear boundaries which may sometimes allow whoever you might be in a situationship with to overstep. They could do certain things that you might not be comfortable with, such as date other people while in the situationship.
The expectations from a person you are in a situationship with might not be in line with what is expected from a relationship, that is where you might begin to see the cracks in your romance, and it could hurt the relationship between the both you if care is not taken.
It could feel like fun and a burden at the same time to be in a situationship.
Situationships can be very confusing, and although it might seem obvious that you and your partner have something going on between you, there’s the problem with the no titles.
If you dislike the vagueness of the situationship, then you should define the relationship. There has to be a confirmation from them to be certain that the both of you are on the same page,
Turning a situationship into a relationship
To turn a situationship into a romantic relationship, it has to be by clearly defining the relationship. You have to make it known to your partner that you want something more out of it.
It shouldn’t be a confrontation for them to define the relationship with you, you shouldn’t set an ultimatum for them to accept your demand to be in a relationship, and you shouldn’t play mind games that could ruin what you have.
Defining what is going on between the two of you has to be a mutual agreement, it could be following a discussion where you state clearly what you want from the relationship and listen to their response. Do not get upset if they are not ready to be in a relationship yet.
For the situationship to truly become a romantic relationship then you should discuss and begin to take seriously some things such as the inclusion of titles or when to start introducing your relationship to family and friends.
You could also bring it up that you want to be exclusive in the relationship. There has to communication, and if the situationship revolved around sexual intimacy alone, they would have to open up emotionally too; trust and honesty should also be brought into the relationship.
Difference between a situationship and a relationship
The difference between a situationship and a relationship could either be subtle or clearly visible; it all depends on the people that are involved as certain situationships could share more similarities to a relationship than some troubled relationship.
One thing is common when it comes to a situationship, there are no titles. Partners in a situationship would rather refer to each other as being close friends instead of the usual title of a boyfriend or girlfriend as seen in most relationships. It is not clear what one person is to the other person even though they might feel a connection, as the relationship has not been defined.
Also, unlike a relationship, a situationship might not be subject to long term planning, and the couple might just be living in the moment, hanging out, going on dates, and having fun. They could simply ignore the deeper topics like marriage and other forms of long term planning.
When in a stuationship, there is lesser expectation than from a boyfriend or a girlfriend. The affair might even be restricted to sexual intimacy and may lack an emotional connection.
There aren’t really any boundaries when it comes to situationships and this may give partners the freedom to do as they wish.
A relationship is bound by commitments, a situationship might lack that commitment a relationship has, it might even be one-sided as some people simply find the situationship convenient until when they are ready to settle down.
Even though some people choose to be exclusive in a situationship, some others might decide to go on dates with other people and might even be in multiple situationships at once.
Why do some people prefer situationships?
There are several reasons people are reluctant to define their relationship, and why a lot of people decide to enter into a situationship than a relationship with someone that they are interested in:
1. Not ready to commit
For someone who wants to take their time before settling down with another person, a situationship simply becomes more convenient. For someone who feels that it would be difficult to combine what they think is the stress of being in a relationship with something else, that person might prefer being in a situationship.
2. Scared of rejection
Some people stay in situationships not necessarily because they don’t want a relationship, but that they are scared of telling the person that they are in a situationship with what they want. Probably out of fear that this person would reject them which could put an end to what they have going on.
Even if it is not really what they want, they rather keep quiet and endure the situationship as it is.
3. They are in another relationship
A person cheating on their partner might be slow to define their relationship with another person if they haven’t ended their relationship with their partners.
It becomes easy to remain in the situationships as they already have another relationship that they are in, and just in case they change their minds and decide to remain with their partners, it’ll be easier for them to end the situationship.
4. Weighing their options
People keep their options open just in case someone better comes for them, they opt for situationships which they find more easy to get rid of rather than to be in a committed relationship.
They don’t really see the person that they are in a situationship with as a potential partner, or perhaps they believe that someone else is a better option. What they do is wait for the person they prefer while keeping the other person by the side, as a situationship.
5. Bad breakup
For someone who just got out of a bad relationship, they might be scared of going through another heartbreak. They might not want to make make the mistake of settling for a partner who would remind them of their previous partner. So they take it slow to define the relationship, too slow that it becomes a situationship.